But the ones that really bother me are these dirty old bastards. The ones that don't like the site of small children. The ones who act like they're gonna blow up if they hear the smallest noises. The ones that tell you you should be doing something, like your five or something. They think they know it all. They think they've been around long enough to get into your business.
Are those your sisters. No. They're my kids. Make sure you watch your sisters. I am. Mind your Business. I have eyes in the back of my head, over here and over there. I know what my kids are doing. Mind you- They are swimming- Right in front of me. Good. That's what you should be doing. I know what I should be doing mother effer. I should be kung fooing your ass.
I should be telling you to go put some shorts on instead of that speedo because no one wants to see your long hairy balls hanging out. We don't wanna see that shit.
I mean... come on NOW. This is the view we get.
And when you get a group of old people together, they immediately start talking about taxes, politics, this and that. And they're getting loud.
Hey Bob. Where's the beer. Why didn't you bring the beer. There's some nice young ladies here. Um. that little lady is ten. Back up.
Funny. When you wanna get LOUD it's Okay....when my KIDS wanna splash you get pissed and leave.....
14 comments:
Oh no, not THAT kind!!!!
To the old lady at the grocery store the other day: just because you have been on the planet for 40 years longer than I have does not entitle you to cut directly in front of me in the check out line.
WTF is wrong with some people!? And ew...nice young ladies at the pool? Back off, creepy old guy!
I life guarded for a summer and have to say, the old people were the AWFUL. I hated when they were around. They always had their ideas on how the pool should be run, regardless of how legal or safe it might have been. Even worse, though, was when they'd bring along their bratty little grandchildren.
yuck attack!
Next time bring a super soaker! Dirty pervs!
Looks like the movie cocoon over there, haha.
I'd punch an old pervert if they were eyeballin' my 10 year old. Sorry you have to deal with hat.
lol that picture made me laugh. Old people, sigh.
Last year, I had to kick an old man in the balls on accident, of course. He was probably in his early 100's. He was literally parading around the pool trying to touch all the little kids. Fucker.
ewwwww....now if there was touching involved then there would have been major beat downs! Can't wait to leave.....
Oh man, these stories KILL ME. Why do they have to be so crotchety????
Haha...crotchety....I love that word.
I seriously hope I'm not going to turn into a yuck old person. I should think about changing my ways because I'm already bitching at the hoodlums in the neighborhood. If I don't get a handle on it, I'll end up being the mean old bitty that beats down thugs and stuff with my purse.
Oh, and the touchy-feely dudes that like 10 yr. olds? It'd be a shame if they drowned.
My husband's grandfather is totally that way. I can't believe the stuff that comes out of his mouth! Especially when it's about physical looks and he's super overweight.
i know a couple "dirty old people" the creep me out.
Ugh, old dudes in Speedos is the worst!
tell the dirty bastard you'll take his viagra away
Post a Comment